Liberal Media?

If a top Clinton official had resigned on a Friday and was arrested the following Monday for obstruction of justice and lying to Federal investigators, how many weeks would the story have occupied the front page?

"What are you talking about, Chaz?" Do any of you know who David Safavian is?

Retro Tuesday Night

The FW is out of town - in San Diego for work. As I'm sure most married men do, when the wife's away, I go back to my bachelor days. Not just my life pre-FW, but all the way back to college. Video games, beer, TV. I'm even listening to an ancient album of mine - Staring at the Sea. I haven't played it in years. I actually own the vinyl version, but don't have a turntable, so I've put on the CD. Something very soothing about listening to vintage The Cure while cooking dinner (steak with steamed asparagus and potatoes and a Sierra Nevada) on a cool Autumn evening. Okay, so my meal is a bit more grown up than what I would have been eating 18 years ago, though I do have Ramen Noodles in the pantry and Schlitz in the fridge!

Did you know

that the word gullible isn't in the dictionary? WTF?

Did anyone know

that this old ass man is still in the NFL?

Home Town Tourist

Friday night, the FW (Fabulous Wife), got a phone call from her Uncle Frankie in Dublin. Except he wasn't in Dublin, he was in New York with his wife, Aunt Elsie visiting there son Emmanuel, who's currently working there for an Irish IT firm. Anyway, Uncle Frankie says not only are they in New York, they're driving down to DC on Saturday and staying at a hotel less than 2 miles from our house. So much for a nice, quiet weekend. The FW is now in grad school and is in class all day on Saturdays, so it was up to me, SuperHusband, to show my Irish in-laws around town. And you know what, I had a great time!

Living here in DC, I take for granted all of the wonderful things we have in this city, and often forget how beautiful it is. But this weekend, I saw it through the eyes of tourists, and I'm very happy I live here.

The 1st thing we did on Saturday, once I picked them up, was to get some lunch. Emamanuel said they just wanted something simple, some diner food. So, I took them to The Diner in Adams Morgan, my favorite part of DC and one very few folks from out of town have heard of or seen. Being Irish, they ordered mash potatoes instead of french fries with their lunch, and proceeded to smother their bread with it, making mashed potato sandwiches. I've never seen that done before, but it looked great! Afterwards, I took them on a driving tour of town (it was pouring rain on Saturday - we got over 7 inches of rain this weekend). I didn't just show them the usual stuff (The White House, all of the monuments, Capitol Hill), but all of the different neighborhoods as well. They were amazed at how green the city is - and they're right. DC is pretty much a city within a forest - absolutely green. Afterwards, they headed down to visit my mother-in-law with my FW.

Sunday, the rain finally stopped, so we trekked out on foot. We walked to the White House and the Ellipse, over to the Washington Monument, down to the Lincoln Memorial (going through the WW2 Memorial), and then over to the Jefferson. They wore me out!!

Hmmm

W's ratings hit an all time low and now there's a terror alert in NYC. Coincidence?

Bill Bennett was right

Unless you've been under a rock the last few days, you've heard about the remarks made by former Sec. of Education Bill Bennett. On his radio show, he said:

But I do know that it's true that if you wanted to reduce crime, you could -- if that were your sole purpose, you could abort every black baby in this country, and your crime rate would go down. That would be an impossible, ridiculous, and morally reprehensible thing to do, but your crime rate would go down.

You know what? He's right. He'd also be right if he said the same about white babies, poor babies, male babies, etc. If you erase a significant portion of your population, crime would have to go down - simple math. But he was an asshole for saying it, because he knew his audience would take it the way the Left has taken it, that he's implying that all blacks commit crime, which we don't. So be upset with what he implied, not with what he said.

Sad and pitiful

A friend of mine tells me that all the stories about the military not having enough people is just the liberal press being against the war. Against the war? The press was beating the war drum as loudly as the administration, but that's another topic. What I want to show you all is this recruiting ad from the National Guard. Yep, join the National Guard and get 3 free downloads from I-tunes!! Like I said, sad and pitiful.

Too Funny

Somehow, my phone number has gotten onto the call lists for Jerry Kilgore, the Republican candidate for governor in Virginia. The 1st call I got, I informed the volunteer that he had the wrong household, we were hardcore Dems. Well, they don't seem to take no for an answer. I got 2 more calls last night, so I decided to have a little fun. I asked the caller what Kilgore thought about gay marriage. He responded that Kilgore believes marriage is between a man and a woman. I said good, because ever since they let the coloreds marry white people, the country's gone bad. A few seconds of silence, followed by "so we can count on your vote?".

DeLay Indicted

But before you say this was simply partisan politics by a Democratic prosecutor, read on:

While Earle is an elected Democrat, as Media Matters for America has previously noted, a June 17 editorial in the Houston Chronicle commended his work: "During his long tenure, Travis County District Attorney Ronnie Earle has prosecuted many more Democratic officials than Republicans. The record does not support allegations that Earle is prone to partisan witch hunts." This assertion supports Earle's own claim about his record; a March 6 article in the El Paso Times reported: "Earle says local prosecution is fundamental and points out that 11 of the 15 politicians he has prosecuted over the years were Democrats."

Besides, juries indict people, not District Attorneys.

Did I ever mention I love soccer? 

C'mon Folks - Show Them You're More Than Just Talk

Seriously, if you think this war is so noble and you're in good health, go sign up. Don't let others die for you.

What the Hell is going on at The University?

There's been a surge in racist incidents at my alma mater, UVa. What the hell? Read some more articles on the racial strife at UVa. Here, here and here.

How I Spent My Vacation

So, I went to San Diego over the weekend to visit my kid brother and his (pregnant) wife. I had a great time, though it's still weird for me to see my brother as a grown-up, married man. He's still a 11 year old kid in my mind - that's how old he was when I left home for college. And now, well he's going to be a dad next month! Before me! My little sister also became a parent before me, so I'm going to be getting advice from them for the 1st time in my life whenever the FW and I have a child. Not sure how I'm going to handle that!

Anyway, San Diego was fantastic. The weather was perfect, around 70 degrees each day, with brilliant sunshine. The 1st thing we did, of course, was go play hoops. When my brother was in high school and college, whenever we got together we would play hoops - it was our way of fighting (you know, like animals in the wild, establishing dominance). Up until this weekend, he'd only beaten me once, and he's still talking about it. Well, my dominance is over. He won 3 out of 5 games. I just can't hang with the young bucks anymore. I "retired" from my men's soccer team this season because I realized I just can't run as fast as want to and my recover time has increased to the point that I'm stiff for days (no Viagra jokes, please).

Went to see the Nats play the Padres Friday night - luckily it was the night Washington won before they began their tailspin. The weirdest thing about the trip was waking up Saturday morning, turning on the TV at 9:00 am, and seeing UVa vs. Syracuse. Something's wrong with football on that early!

So here's to my little brother, who's now a married man and a father to be. You've done good, boy (but I'll still whip that ass!).

Mmm, mmm, mmm!!

So, my Fab Wife bought me a bottle of "Ultimate Seasonings". It's "an exotic combination of fresh herbs and vegetables that bring the true taste of Africa to your table."

Trying to get me in touch with my roots, I guess. Whatever the reason, I'm using it now to make a chicken stew and rice. It'll be done in a few minutes, but man, it smells awesome!!!

Mission Accomplished

Um, no. Not really. As of today, over 1900 Americans have died in Iraq since the invasion. Is it worth it?

Great Start

Well, my trip to San Diego has gotten off to a great start. Not!!! The other night, I made reservations on SuperShuttle, to get me to Dulles (didn't want the FW to have to drive me all the way out here and then fight traffic to get back to work). The van was scheduled to pick me up between 4:50 and 5:05 am. Yep, A.M. !!! Around 5:15, no sign of the van, and no call from SuperShuttle. At 5:25, I called to see what was going on. No problem, they told me, the van is on the way - you're the last pick-up and he's just running a little late. He'll be there in 10-15 minutes. Well, at 5:50, still no van, so I called again. This time, I was asked "no one called you? You're going to have to call a cab or have your wife take you, we don't have any drivers today". WTF? They've already charged my card for the shuttle. They told me to get a receipt from the cab and fax it to them. So now, I'm out of close to $100 - $35 for the original reservation and $60 for the cab ride. I'm not a happy camper. But I made it to Dulles, where I am now sitting, drinking my coffee and chillin'. I'll holla from the left side later today.

Going West

Leaving in a few hours to visit my little brother and his wife in San Diego, so I'll be blogging from the other coast for a few days.

I believe!!

The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

This is great - I urge everyone to read it and check out the website.

Open letter to the Kansas School Board:

I am writing you with much concern after having read of your hearing to decide whether the alternative theory of Intelligent Design should be taught along with the theory of Evolution. I think we can all agree that it is important for students to hear multiple viewpoints so they can choose for themselves the theory that makes the most sense to them. I am concerned, however, that students will only hear one theory of Intelligent Design.

Let us remember that there are multiple theories of Intelligent Design. I and many others around the world are of the strong belief that the universe was created by a Flying Spaghetti Monster. It was He who created all that we see and all that we feel. We feel strongly that the overwhelming scientific evidence pointing towards evolutionary processes is nothing but a coincidence, put in place by Him.

It is for this reason that I’m writing you today, to formally request that this alternative theory be taught in your schools, along with the other two theories. In fact, I will go so far as to say, if you do not agree to do this, we will be forced to proceed with legal action. I’m sure you see where we are coming from. If the Intelligent Design theory is not based on faith, but instead another scientific theory, as is claimed, then you must also allow our theory to be taught, as it is also based on science, not on faith.

Some find that hard to believe, so it may be helpful to tell you a little more about our beliefs. We have evidence that a Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe. None of us, of course, were around to see it, but we have written accounts of it. We have several lengthy volumes explaining all details of His power. Also, you may be surprised to hear that there are over 10 million of us, and growing. We tend to be very secretive, as many people claim our beliefs are not substantiated by observable evidence. What these people don’t understand is that He built the world to make us think the earth is older than it really is. For example, a scientist may perform a carbon-dating process on an artifact. He finds that approximately 75% of the Carbon-14 has decayed by electron emission to Nitrogen-14, and infers that this artifact is approximately 10,000 years old, as the half-life of Carbon-14 appears to be 5,730 years. But what our scientist does not realize is that every time he makes a measurement, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is there changing the results with His Noodly Appendage. We have numerous texts that describe in detail how this can be possible and the reasons why He does this. He is of course invisible and can pass through normal matter with ease.

I’m sure you now realize how important it is that your students are taught this alternate theory. It is absolutely imperative that they realize that observable evidence is at the discretion of a Flying Spaghetti Monster. Furthermore, it is disrespectful to teach our beliefs without wearing His chosen outfit, which of course is full pirate regalia. I cannot stress the importance of this enough, and unfortunately cannot describe in detail why this must be done as I fear this letter is already becoming too long. The concise explanation is that He becomes angry if we don’t.

You may be interested to know that global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of Pirates since the 1800s. For your interest, I have included a graph of the approximate number of pirates versus the average global temperature over the last 200 years. As you can see, there is a statistically significant inverse relationship between pirates and global temperature.

In conclusion, thank you for taking the time to hear our views and beliefs. I hope I was able to convey the importance of teaching this theory to your students. We will of course be able to train the teachers in this alternate theory. I am eagerly awaiting your response, and hope dearly that no legal action will need to be taken. I think we can all look forward to the time when these three theories are given equal time in our science classrooms across the country, and eventually the world; One third time for Intelligent Design, one third time for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, and one third time for logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence.

Sincerely Yours,

Bobby Henderson, concerned citizen.

Brownie quits

Only took him 2 weeks to do something right.